Attitude

Rebalance your life

……and achieve what’s really important

How was your day? My doctor friend asks me daily when he is finally house from the hospital. On my bad days, ones involving deadlines uncooperative sources on spats with editors. I grouse and rank in reply.

How was Younis? I remember to ask when I have finished. On his bad days he’ll say something like, “we lost a patient.” Doctor’s patients are children with heart disease, some of whom are waiting for transplant and don’t receive one in time.

“How old”? I ask because I have learned there is little else to say. He answers then seeks out our two boys for an extra hug on bedtime story. And I vow silently for the umpteenth lime never to lose perspective again.

For many of us work lays claim to our time and emotion, possessing us as completely as any spouse on child. But those of us who think we have hard jobs can learn a lot from those who really do.

I wonder how some people investigate murder scenes or dive for airplane wreckage all week then have the energy to cheer for the school football team on Sunday afternoon. Of the rest of us cannot keep the stress of work from oozing over & staining the rest of life, how can they? Move to the point. If they can, why on earth cannot we?

Other talk about building walls and maintaining distances. They learn to draw a line as if to say “I’ll give this much of myself but no more.”

That is the lesson for those of us whose work is not a matter of the life & death, but has the ability to use us up worthless. The only way to get the work done is to come up for air periodically. To shut the door and cook, even if you have lost a caller. To smile for your sons, even as you mourn a patient. To turn off the computer even on deadline and simply be there for yours, so you can both go back out tomorrow and do it all again.

Suresh Morey